Can you imagine what it must be like to have a Mom who shot her own three children? We are talking about the 27 year old Becky who is all set to appear in Oprah Winfrey's episode on Big CBS Love on 5 October, 8 pm. Becky's mom Diane Downs had complained in 1983 that her children had been brutally shot by a stranger when they were driving down a rural road in Oregon. The incident killed her 7-year-old daughter Cheryl, paralysed 3-year-old Danny and 8-year-old Christie had lost so much blood she suffered a stroke. But then later at the trial her surviving daughter Christie, took the witness stand and testified that her mother was the murderer and not any stranger. Diane was convicted of shooting her children and was sentenced to life imprisonment plus 50 years. During the trial, it was revealed that Diane was pregnant. Ten days after she was found guilty, Diane gave birth to a baby girl who was adopted soon after. Today, that baby is called Becky. After years of hiding the truth, Becky decided to speak up about what it was like to discover that her birth mother is a cold-blooded killer. Becky says she always knew she was adopted, but when she turned eight, she started asking questions about her biological mother. When she was 11, Becky tricked her babysitter to tell her the name of her biological mother. When she found out about Diane Downs, she went to a book store nearby and went through Small Sacrifices, a book on her mother. When the truth about Diane started sinking in, Becky began to believe that Diane was not a mother, she was a monster. From there, Becky says she went into a downward spiral. "I started drinking, doing drugs, sleeping around," she says. "I really was just trying to find love from anywhere I could. I ended up getting pregnant when I was 17 years old." At 20 years old, Becky found herself broke, homeless and pregnant for a second time. "I made the hardest decision I've ever had to make," she says. "I decided to put [my son] up for adoption. I was in so much pain from losing my son that I wanted to relate to somebody, I wanted to know that the pain I felt was okay, and I reached out to Diane," Becky tells Oprah. Becky wrote a letter to Diane in prison telling her who she was. Diane reacted normally to Becky’s first letter. But as time went by, Becky says her letters got frightening. Becky says she now regrets ever writing to Diane. "I have an amazing family, and there's not room in my life for someone like Diane Downs," Becky says. Diane may be the woman who gave birth to her, but Becky says they don't have to have a connection. "I was raised in a godly home, and I'm well adjusted," she says. "My son is amazing and well adjusted. And if I don't want to, I don't have to think about Diane again."